Saturday, August 28, 2010

So Relieved!

Precious Little One,

I am so, so, so relieved, excited, ecstatic, and about thirty other synonyms for "happy" right now!

The test results were great!

I called in yesterday afternoon, and the nurse I've been talking with (who has been really wonderful to work with, Lord bless her) asked me to wait on hold for a minute while she looked up my results.

In the past, it usually took her approximately twelve seconds to get back to me with my results.

Yesterday, I was on hold for about two minutes.

After thirty seconds or so, my stomach began twisting and turning like it does when I have a feeling something bad is going to happen.

I thought to myself, "It's probably taking her so long because my results are bad, and she's working up the strength to tell me that I'm going to have a miscarriage. She's bucking herself up to break the news to me. I shouldn't be doing this at work, especially while I'm supposed to be training someone. How am I going to tell her that I need to go home without breaking down?"

Such trajectories of thought continued for another minute and a half.

I almost decided to just hang up so I wouldn't have to hear her say it.

And then she took me off of hold and told me that she didn't have my progesterone results yet (explaining the delay) but the results for my hCG were, and I quote, "excellent."

Excellent!!!

She said I should call back in a couple of hours for the results of my progesterone.

I texted the news about my hCG to your dad and told him that we would have to wait until 4:30 for the progesterone results.

But only an hour later, she called me with the news that my progesterone results had just come in. They were, quoting again, "fantastic."

Fantastic!!!

So fantastic, in fact, that they reduced my progesterone intake by 50%.

My hCG is excellent, and my progesterone is fanstatic!

I almost cried as I thanked her on the phone.

I even tearing up now, just writing about it.

Your dad called me at about 4 o'clock, wondering if I had heard anything yet.

Needless to say, he was thrilled with the news - he and I are both SO relieved and SO happy!

He even told you he loves you for the very first time last night when I got home from work. It was so sweet :)

I think he was trying not to get too attached until we got the test results, too.

Not that he wasn't attached before that (same here, for that matter), but I think the positive test results allowed him to let his guard down with you and with this pregnancy.

In fact, I think the positive test results have allowed me to let down my guard with you and this pregnancy.

We love you so much, Baby; we're so excited to welcome you into our family.

And now the week-and-a-half that we have to wait before my first prenatal appointment doesn't seem so far away - so impossible to reach - as it did before.

It actually feels like it's right around the corner!

And right around the corner from my first appointment will be my second appointment, and right around the corner from my second appointment will be the 14-week zone, and right around the corner from the 14-week zone will be the "gender appointment," and so on and so forth until you are finally in my arms - it all seems so within-reach right now.

It all seems so possible.

I feel like the world is my oyster, like I can do anything.

As long as you are safely tucked inside of me and growing away, there are no limits.

We love you, Baby; keep growing strong!

Love Always,

Mom

1 comment:

  1. Hurray! I'm so excited and happy for you! This is just wonderful news. I'm glad the progesterone supplements seemed to do the trick - and that everything is progressing just as it should.

    I know exactly what you mean about waiting on hold for test results. The longer they take, the more the fear takes over.

    I can imagine how thrilled you and your husband must be! I think you mentioned your due date was in April - a spring baby! I think that is so wonderful. Spring, a time of birth and new beginnings. I hope the time goes by fast for you - cause I know how anxious you must be to have that little one in your arms!

    I'm due to have my little one just a couple months before you... we have so much to look forward to in the new year.

    Sending you big hugs!! Take good care of yourself (I'm sure your husband will see to that) and know that I'm thinking of you!!

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